The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Randomize
