If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
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