she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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