If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
He told everyone he was freezing their keys so they couldn't drive drunk. When I opened the freezer this morning, my keys were at the bottom of an unfrozen ice cream tub of vodka.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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