Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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