if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
You dont lie about slip and slides
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Randomize
