Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
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You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
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All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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