is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
