32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
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The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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