In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
