this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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