bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
