I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize