I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
