I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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