Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
