No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Randomize
