if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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