I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
Randomize