are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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