my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
