you suck at this game today
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
# Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
29 Super Simple DIY Drinking Games
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.