Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I think I won the penis lottery.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Randomize
