check it out our google latitudes are spooning
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
