office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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