We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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