Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize
