I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Randomize
