so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
