so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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