I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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