why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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