Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
