i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
