If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
