we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
