That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
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