No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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