We won't sleep together?
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
They took my balls.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
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