That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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