this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
