big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
