I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I cockslap morals
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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