singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
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