And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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