Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Randomize
