i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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