i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
