Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
