Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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